Camp Commune
by Miakakilala
Summary: Duo's worst nightmare has come true! He is being sent to BIBLE CAMP! How will he survive and make the best out of it? I just feel sorry for the camp. Chapter 9 is up finally.
1. Reality Nightmare

I DO NOT own Gundam Wing or any of the original characters in the show, though to god I wish I did.

AN. This is a story that I thought up some day in school when my friends were talking about Girl Guide camps. The one guy around us said that the only place that could be "safer" (us being completely insane and demonic) than us at guide camp was us at bible camp!!!! Hahaha. So the story begins....

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Chapter 1: Reality Nightmare

Duo was cowering in the corner, covering his ears and repeating to himself "no, no No, NO NOOO". He was in his fourth family after being taken in by the Maxwell Church. Now, at the ripe old age of 15, His one true nightmare had become a reality.

Only moments ago did these horrors unveil themselves...

insert weird flashback music here

"Now kids", Duo's new foster mommy had started, "your daddy and me have a wonderful surprise for you all. I bet that you'll never guess." After a semi-long pause she could not hold her little surprise in any longer. "We've signed you all up for... BIBLE CAMP!!!"

end flashback

No this is where we entered with Duo in the corner. After his loving family pried his away from the wall, they sat the kids down and told them all about the wonders that they would get to experience. Bunk beds in a cabin, crafts, canoe rides, archery, swimming, bible stories and skits, and most importantly, basking in the light of God for 24/7. The whole thought of it all made little Duo have a convulsion right there and then.

"Now Duo, this is especially for you. With all you're moving around, I don't think that you've gotten to get the real child experience of summer camp. And just think. With your...behavior... some time with God may do you some good. We got the idea for this camp all because of you." At this point, Duo was making a mental note to kill himself. Fast.

All the other kids in the household were ecstatic. They had always had fun at their little church and now they got to spend 6 weeks with all their little church buddies and pastor. Seven year old Susan would be with the junior group called Bible Buddies. Tom and his twin brother Erik would be with their fellow nine year olds in the God Givers. And Duo as well as his foster sister Sarah, of the same age, where with all the other teenagers in the group of Christ Crusaders. There was no option now, the camp was paid for and Duo was the only one not excited.

His foster mom took him aside. "I know that you will have so much fun. I bet that you can't wait" taking his odd look the wrong way she added, "I know that you just got settled in here and that you are a little shy around strangers but trust me, once you start getting into the spirit of camp, you'll never want to leave." And with that, she left Duo in a look of absolute horror. _And_ he thought to himself _I am never shy!!! I'll show you and who knows; maybe I can make this camp interesting._


	2. Goodbye Life

I'm back...... Boy this is the fastest I've ever updated. Thanks to those reviews. They really made my day. You know who you are and I feel the same way. I've been having fun with this fic and I've got tons of ideas so it should be updated faster than all the others. Enjoy!

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Chapter 2 – Goodbye Life

Duo was going to die. During the whole car ride to the place where the bus was leaving from, his foster family were singing Christian songs about how great god is and the wonderful bible. They were doing this for the whole 45 minutes!!!!! Duo was rhythmically banging his head on the car window. Lightly at first but with each new and completely demonic (or at least in his mind) song, the light tapping turned to hard pounding, when all of a sudden...

"We're Here!!" followed by an excessive "YAY" from the insane children in the vehicle. Everyone enthusiastically jumped out of their seats and raced to get their sleeping bags, pillows and duffle bags. Everyone that is except Duo that is. He stayed in the car. That is until he heard the words "I've got presents for you all". Then he raced out the door, stubbing his toe and bashing his knee in at the same time. Boy that door can be vicious.

Duo caught up with the rest of his family. Joan, his new mommy, started handing out square wrapped presents. Duo tore off the dove covered paper as fast as possible to reveal.....the back of a book. He turned it over slowly, dreading what he might see. Glimpsing at the title, he gasped and dropped the book, going stiff.

"Oh Duo, you dropped this" Susan picked the book up and handed it to him. "You don't want to lose it. It's sooooooo important" And then she went skipping off to hug her mommy thank you. Duo looked at the cover again. He shuddered violently. Closing his eyes he thought "_It's just a dream. When I open my eyes, it will all be gone and there will be a gun or a scythe or something remotely useful in my hands" _Duo lifted one eyelid open slightly. Nope. Still a Bible. CRAP!

Joan came over and wrapped Duo in a tight hug. "Do you like it? It's the special student edition so it has lots of tips and activities on how to get even closer to our great savior. I figured that since you never bring your old one to church, you must have worn it out and you are ashamed to let us see it in its condition. So we got you a brand new bible. It will be your new best friend at camp." Oh god could Duo hardly keep from laughing. He had never had a bible and never wanted one. It would make good fire starter though.

After setting his things in the under compartment of the bus, Duo stood up and finally actually looked around himself. He briefly recognized some of the kids around. A group of about six girls were talking up a storm. Some of the little kids were crying to their parents. Guess that they were scared or something. There was Heero and the gang. And behind him a line for the bus was forming.... WAIT!!!!!

"HEERO, QUATRE, TROWA, WUFFIE!!!!! What Are You Guys Doing Here?!?!?!?! Are you going to help me escape?"

Heero was the first to speak. "Duo, we are going to have to kill your folks."

"For trying to send me here? Yea. Can you believe it? I was like gonna die if I had to spend six weeks as a Christ Crusader. shudders Thank god that you guys came. Now where is the get-a-way car so I can put my stuff in and we can high-tail it outta here?" Duo looked around.

"There is no car." Wufei looked kinda pissed

"But then..."

Duo was interrupted by Quatre. "Your mom called our parents. She asked them if they would consider sending us here so you wouldn't be lonely. She hoped that you would be more comfortable this way. So now we are all off the Camp Commune with you."

Heero piped in "and that's why we are going to kill your folks. Our stuff is already on the bus."

"Well...." Duo was interrupted as his mom came over and gave him a big hug

"Group Hug!" She called out. The whole family ran over and joined in the hug, with Duo right in the middle, gasping for air. The G-boys took a step back. Maybe Duo had it off a little worse than they did. Joan went in for a kiss. "We are going to miss you so much. Have fun and don't forget to write us every single wittle day. You'll all be in our prayers back home." Yeah, he definitely had it worse off!

"Okay Kids! Time to say goodbye and hop onto the bus. It's Camp Time!!!!" The pastors really seemed to be excited about spending the next two months with hundreds of little whiny kids and a bunch of teenagers. They all raced to the bus, without saying goodbye to anyone. They wanted good seats so none of the counselors could here them talk.

Once the bus started filling, kids began to talk and sing. And sing and sing and sing!!!!! "_Shinigami save me now"_


	3. The Wheels on the Bus Go POP

AN: Well this may be the last chapter for a few weeks. Going south for vacation and I don't know if I will be able to write anything while I'm gone. Will only be for a while though. Thanks for all the support and comments. I love you all.

Chapter 3: The Wheels on the Bus Go POP!

"I call shotgun!!!"

"Why...Duo, that's your name, right?...You want to sit up here right close to us councilors?" there was that totally freaky smiley face. The one that makes you want to scream _"AHHHHH Disney!!!"_, "That's great! We'll have the time of our lives; singing, chatting, taking turns reading bible verses aloud... "

"Back back back back BACK!!!!!!! I claim the very absolute BACK!" And with that he raced to the end of the bus, with horror found a child already sitting there, picked him up, and raced the bewildered one to the front. Duo placed the child hastily (but gently) right next to the forbidden councilors and then dashed back and plopped his big but lovable behind onto the mildly soft pleather seating. The rest of the gang followed in a disturbed, awed way. Heero and Wufei took the first chance to grab the seat across the aisle, for fear of either of them being stuck sitting next to the hyperactive, yet still pissed off about the whole thing, youth. Quatre took the available seat in from of Duo and Trowa was quick to accept the seat next to him. The two turned to face Duo while Heero and Wufei rotated slightly, not wanting to be left out, but still making it seem as if they didn't really care. There would still be a few minutes till the bus would leave. Many of the younger Bible Buddies were still a little weary of the whole camp idea ("_what idiot wouldn't"_ Duo commented), and their counselors-to-be were helping them get adjusted to the idea, say goodbye, and get on the bus. Duo was fine with this. It meant that he would get a break before the bus began to fill with the ever-so-joyful song of Christ. shudder.

"So Duo," Heero broke the silence," What exactly do we get to do at this... this..."

"Camp" Quatre tried to help, "Camp?"

"Noooo.....this...this...prison for torture and inhumane punishment of souls"

"Well.", Duo imitated the counselors creepy Disney grin, "We get to sleep in bunk beds, go swimming, canoeing, do archery, and in general bask in the light of God 24/7" You could almost feel the bus shake with the amount of shuddering and cringing going on throughout the members of the G-boy gang.

All Wufei could manage with a small, squeaky, "_Help_"

After some time and much sneaking out of Discmans and gameboys (both of which they were not top have at camp) the bus started to fill up with the last few people who were in the parking lot. The last on were a group of six girls, all looking within their mid teens. All except one, whose size was a tad closer to that of a seventh grader, rather than someone just starting high school.

"Hey there", one of the girls had long brownish red hair, "Guess we get to sit back here with you. All the other spots are taken" She slid into the empty spot right next to the braided baka. The rest picked various close to the others. "What did you do? Scare off any kid that tried to sit even remotely close to you guys?"

"That's about it" everyone but Quatre replied.

"Smart thinking! I'm impressed. They're most likely going to burst into song at some point. That would be a fate worse than death. Oh hey, by the way, I'm Holly. The ones in front of the guy with the ponytail and that other dude are Jade and Madison. Beware of Jade. She's kinda quiet but can be very vicious at times. But Madison is ok. The three in front of them are Bridget, Tommie, and Alise."

"Now, are they safe to talk too?" Duo inquired with a grin

"Depends.....Do any of you guys actually want to be here?"

There was once again another shudder followed by a "GOD NO" by most of the boys. Quatre was the only one not to agree with the others. "This wasn't my plan for the summer, but how bad can it be? We may as well make the best of it."

"Okay....well first of all; Alise, the short one, is the only one here that doesn't mind coming. I don't believe that any of us other than her are Christian. Me and Bridget are Wiccan and everyone else is..., well who knows. No second, Alise can be very hyper, Bridget very cute, and Tommie is a little Goth but mostly kinda normal . That's what makes her scary."

Trowa looked puzzled. "Then why are you even here?"

Bridget looked up into Trowa's eyes. "My grandma is trying to save my soul"

"Most of our parents are religious and want us to have the whole experience. I know that my mom had an awesome time while she was at a church camp. No clue how anyone could but.... she's odd.", Holly contemplated the idea for a moment and then shook her head, "It's sad really"

"The wheels on the bus go round and round, round and round, round and..."

Wufei was about to scream. "There singing Duo. SINGING!!!"

Heero had something to add to the song. "Why can't the wheel on this jus just POP! Then the horrible crash that is sure to follow will kill them all and we will be put out of our misery before we get to the pain and suffering that we are about to face?"

"Make it stop. Make the bad noise stop!" Wufei huddled into a small ball on the seat, plugging his ears. But it didn't stop. Not for a very long, long time.

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A.N.: sorry bout the short chappie but wanted to get this done. What do you think about me new characters? I really want to know so I can see if they should be in the story frequently r jus get edited out. They will be quite interesting later on if they do stay. See you all in a few short weeks. Toodles!


	4. Last Hope

Sorry for the long wait. But here is Chapter 4!!!!!! Long overdue I know.

Chapter 4: Last Hope

One of the older Bible Buddies peaked out of the window and gazed slightly ahead of the yellow cheese wagon bus. A look of inexplicable joy crept across her face as she caught a glimpse of the wonders only a child could enjoy.

"I see the camp!!! I see it! I see IT!!"

"Oh Damn" The team of terror had finally been able to drown out the sound of cheerful singing about an hour back down the road and had quickly divided into small groups. Duo, Alise, Holy and Bridget sat on the two last seats on the right hand side of the bus, having an educational, (though at most points rowdy) discussion on the aspects of different religions, contradicting the beliefs of each other and so forth. Alise was defending her Christian background while Holly and Bridget added in the concepts of Wicca and other Pagan based religions. Duo was quick to complete the discussion with his vies of Shinigami.

On the back left seat Quatre and Trowa where quietly reading and casually adding their comments to the conversation happening beside them. Tommie sat in front of them with Jade beside her. Their two gameboys (One borrowed from Holly, the others Jades) were connected by cable, and together they battled the parlous monsters in the world of Mario. Split between the two of them was a Discman. Each of them had one headphone in their ear.

Heero was seated in front of them, by himself, stretched out across the seat. He was a usual being anti-social. In his hands were a game of Tetris and a Discman was rhythmically playing music into his ears.

In the opposite seat, Wufei gazed out the window in a trance-like state. Madison was beside him, contemplating the many various ways to take over the world. For some strange reason, the unusual use of gophers kept entering into her mind and plans.

Well now they had all been interrupted. Pastor Jason stood up at the front of the bus and announced "camper put on your smile. We're HERE!"

The "YAY" that followed covered up the groan that was admitted.

Almost everyone rushed off the bus, all either eager to claim and gather their duffle bags or to meet old friends who had arrived form other churches on the different buses. Duo turned back to Holly. "Now as I was saying, Shinigami could so kick Batman's ass."

"Ah Duo, I hate to break it to yah but that's not what we were talking about" Alise commented.

"I know but I've been thinking about it ever since we started talking and since we were so rudely interrupted, I can't remember what we were talking about."

Heero lifted his head up. "Hey… everyone is gone"

"What? Is your music too loud? We're here."

"Oh"

"Hey… I got an idea" Duo smiled. "The buses leave after all the bags are take out, right?"

"Yeah…" Holly wondered what the braid boy had in mind.

"Well if we hide in our seats, maybe the start to leave with us still on it"

Wufei was skeptical. "Duo, that will never ever work. It's impossible. Who would be stupid enough to fall for something like that?"

"Quick! Here comes a councilor!" Duo pushed Wufei down, nearly killing him in the process. Everyone ducked under the seats. They would try absolutely anything (event he impossible) to get out of the six weeks of misery that was to follow.

The councilor stood at the front of the bus and quickly glanced around. "This ones empty now too." He called to the driver, who was unloading the very last bag from the side cabinets.

"Kay. I'll take this thing back to town. See yah in six weeks." And with that he closed the side compartment and switched places with the councilor. The driver then sat down behind the wheel and started up the bus.

"I can not believe that that worked" Trowa whispered from under the back seat.

"Free, Free, We're FREE. Oh Joy!" Duo did as much of a victory dance as possible under the confined conditions. Then he poked Wufei. "Wu-man, I told you that it'd work. Wufei? Wufei…" poke poke

While being brutally knocked down, Wufei had hit his forehead on the edge on the window. A good sized bump was now forming on the injured area. He was also knocked out cold.

"Oops. Did I do that?"

Quatre looked up. "I believe so Duo."

"Oh" There was quiet for about five long minutes until…

"Ah guys, I hate to say this," Duo looked worried, "But I gotta sneeze"

"Aw Shit!" Heero sighed. "Just when I thought this nightmare was going to actually end."

Holly quickly and stealthily reached over and plugged the nose beside her with her finger. In a short, though it didn't seem like it, moment a very small "achoo" was admitted. Holly released her grip as everyone's glance rapidly shifted towards the driver. But he had been concentrating too hard on the rocky road ahead to hear.

"AH-CHOO! AH-CHOO! AH-CHOO!" You could feel it in the floor, not to mention hear the echo of Duo's head hitting the metal back emergency door of the bus with each sneeze.

This woke Wufei up and he lifted his head to see what was happening which only resulting in him immediately hitting his head on the top of the bottom of the seat. This time, more carefully, Wufei lifted up his head.

"Bless You." The driver called out. It took him a moment "Wait a minute…" His head whipped around and saw Wufei's head looking out into the aisle.

"Owwww…Where am I? And why does my head hurt so much?" Everyone else then looked up, embarrassed looks gleaming upon their faces.

"What in the god Lords name is going on here?!?!?!" the driver yelled

Duo looked at Wufei. "You're in a bus but are about to end up in Hell"

And the bus stopped with a jerk.

A/N: hope you enjoyed! Please R and R about anything in the story or about it.


	5. Vision of Hell

AN. Back again. This time faster than usual. Going to have a light homework period for some time so things should be updated faster. No promises though. Shortish chapter cause its 10:30 at night. Starting next chapter I will be doing a little diary entry from Duo about what he learns or finds out in each chapter. It will be right after the title. But that is for next time.

Disclaimer: Haven't said this for awhile, I do not own gundam wing or any of the original character. I do own the made up ones though. And to god how I wished I owned Duo! Lol.

Chapter 5: The Vision of Hell

"So you're saying that all of you fell asleep on the bus ride here. I can't believe that we didn't even see you when we checked the bus. You guys almost gave to driver a heart attack. Lucky you all woke up before it was too late to turn back."

Once the bus had stopped, and after much yelling, the driver had turned the bus around and took Camp Commune's new inmates back to their prison. After much convincing lying and jumbled story telling, the gang was able to convince Pastor Jason that coincidentally they had all fell asleep during the long trip up, fallen off their seats ( While still not waking up added Quatre), were not awakened by all the commotion of arriving at camp, and for some reason was woken by Duo's sneeze. The bump on Wufei's was because he had a chronic habit of repeatedly hitting his head on the wall in his sleep.

"Now be quick and go pick up your bags. They are about to start dividing campers into their cabins." Jason motioned with his hand for them to hurry and follow him. "I can tell you don't want to miss meeting all your cabin buddies." A mind reading this guy was not. He led the way to the flag field where the announcements where about to begin.

The middle of the far end stood a flagpole sporting the colonies flag on top. Right below that was the camp's flag, a large golden sun behind a single red cross. On either side of the flagpole stood a six-foot tall cross. A large pile of duffel bags had appeared in the middle and it was swarmed with kids trying to gather up their bags. The gang rushed to grab their only relation to the outside world. These bags had everything that was them inside and no one wanted a camper to mistakenly grab their bag instead of the right one.

Holly was the first one to dive upon the pile. She expertly grabbed her bag with one hand and quickly pulled it out, all within a few seconds. "I've had practice" was all she said to the stares directed at her.

Duo was the last to find his bag. It had been placed at the very bottom of the enormous stack and quite frankly, he seemed a little freaked when he found it there. All he kept saying was "I hope they didn't break. I really hope they didn't break" Everyone looked at him funny but they all helped out to pull the black bag from beneath its imprisonment.

"God Duo, What do you all have in this thing? It weighs a ton!" Heero asked.

"Oh you'll see. Mwah ha ha ha ha."

Alise looked bewildered. "Should I be scared now?"

In unison all the boys replied with a loud "YES!"

"Okay. Sounds good."

Pastor Jason now stood up on the platform in front of the flag area with all the other councilors and the other youth pastors from the churches present at the camp.

"Okay everyone. Fist the camp rules and then you get to hear what you are all waiting for! Cabin Assignments!"

"YAY!"

"So rule number one: We love everyone here. So I don't want to hear anything mean said to or about anyone.

Rule number 2: Have fun and if you see someone not having fun, help them have fun.

Number three: Lights out is as follows: nine o'clock for the Bible Buddies, ten o'clock for the God Givers and eleven o'clock for all Christ Crusaders. The days are going to be so packed full of fun stuff that you'll all need your rest.

Number four: The fences go around the camp property. You are not allowed to go passed those fences.

And number five: All Bible Buddies and God Givers must have a buddy with them at all times. For everyone, tell your councilor where you will be if you have to leave your group for even a moment. They must know where you are at all times.

Follow these and things will be awesome. Now for your cabin groups."

The group tuned out the first part of this to make faces at each other about all the stupid rules. Did Jason really expect them to follow them? He must have a few screws loose in more than one place. Now Jason was getting to the Christ Crusader groups. How would this torture turn out?

The list was being read out. Every so often they would hear one of their names.

"Madison B. – Cabin E3

Tommie D. – Cabin E1

Jade D. – Cabin E3

Bridget K. – Cabin E1

Holly N. – Cabin E6

Alise W. – Cabin E6"

Now it was time for the boy's Cabins.

"Trowa B. – Cabin F2

Wufei C. – Cabin F5

Duo M. – Cabin F4

Quatre W. – Cabin F2

Heero Y. – Cabin F5

Now off to your new homes to get settled. See you all at dinner!"

"Crap! I'm all by myself! None of the gang is with me" Was all Duo could muster. Some _one must really have been out to get him_ He thought as he dragged his bag and followed his councilor and unknown cabin members to the cabin of soon to be doom.

AN. A shortish chappy cause it is getting late. Decided to make one chapter into two so I could get this posted. More of a transition chapter really. Thanks to everyone who reviewed and to all those who gave me ideas. I'll personally thank you as I use those ideas, to give you credit. Hope you enjoyed.


	6. That is You, This is Me

AN: I'm back! Welcome to Chapter 6. Don't have much to say except that I'm hyper so this could be interesting. And remember, Duo's Daily Diary starts today.

Disclaimer: I don't own Gundam Wing. Sigh

Chapter 6: That is You, This is Me

_Duo's Diary: You must swear to tell the truth, the whole truth, and more truth than anyone could ever want to know!_

"Okay happy campers, I'm your camp counselor Ryan for the next wonderful six weeks! We are going to have the best time all summer! Don't you all agree?" Ryan paused for a brief second so the boys could let out a cheer. "And now…. Here is Cabin F4, Your new home!"

Duo was standing on the porch of a log cabin. Surrounding him was a group of seven other boys who looked to range from the ages of 13 to 16. All the others bared wide grins as Ryan showed them the area around the cabin. The outside fire pit about 50 meters away where they would be cooking their own dinner a few times, the flagpole where they would put their cabin flag (to be designed by them _grin_) up, and the trail that led to the bathroom that they would be sharing with the other five teen boy's cabins.

"Now I'll let you guys all get settled and then we will go over the cabin rules."

Duo blurted out, "I thought we already went over all the stupid rules! Why do we have to again?"

"Well my shining little camper, first of all, we don't use that word here, or any other bad words. God doesn't like them. And second, those were only the general camp rules. We also need cabin ones. That way everyone can be happy campers! Now go in there and pick out your bunks". And with that Ryan unlocked the door and the kids bolted in.

Duo had been one of the first into the large room, shoving past all the rest. He quickly ran through the small boot area, kicking off his shoes, and around the wall the separated the room from the boot area. Duo picked the bunk that was against this wall and right under the window that looked out into the trees. "I claim top!" He shouted as he tossed his duffle on the bed.

Once everyone had a chance to pick out a bed, they started to unpack their sleeping bags and gear and set up their "room". Every bunk has a set of shelves beside it so they could put their clothes and other belongings on it. There where four set of bunks, two against each opposing wall and one single bed against the back wall for Ryan.

Duo had decided that for the moment he was at least going to make himself comfortable until he had a chance to escape. His blood red sleeping bag was unrolled onto the mattress and his black pillow rested snuggly on top. Foo Foo, his hand made stuffed bat claimed the corner as his new temporary home. Duo pulled out his framed picture of Solo as well as one of him and his group of friends at Duo's last birthday (Of them all playing Twister), and a final one of Father Maxwell and Sister Helen. These all went on the top of the shelf, which happened to be vertical with the bed and nestled right where Duo's head would be when he was asleep. His clothes went on the shelf and the rest of the contents of the duffle stayed in the bag, which he placed at the end of his bed.

Duo then glanced around. Some of the others were putting up posters on the spaces by their beds. This triggered Duo's memory to put up the three posters he had brought. One of the giant mecha Deathscythe, one of the Harry Potter Crew, and the other of the Spice Girls.

Now everyone had finished unpacking and they were all sitting casually on their bunks talking amongst each other. Except Duo of course. Ryan called everyone to attention.

"I think now it would be time to get to know each other. How about we all go around the room and introduce ourselves and then say one of our favorite things. Then everyone can ask that person a question about something that they want to know about him. I'll start. My name is Ryan and my absolute favorite food is spaghetti. Now you can each ask me a question. Who wants to ask first?"

Duo raised his hand "Ah yeah…what is the strange psychopathic disease that makes you like this? And please say it's not contagious."

"That is not a nice question. We'll go on to the next one."

And this is how it went through all the boys. Across from Duo was some pussy boy. And in the bunk under him was another pussy boy. And to the left of them where two more pussy boys. And across from them (beside duo on his right) where, you guessed it, 2 more pussy boys. Duo didn't really pay any attention to anything that these guys had to say. In fact, he was about to fall asleep right then and there but suddenly…..

"Okay happy camper by the window, it's your turn."

"PASS!"

"Sorry Camper but the game doesn't work like that. We all shared with you and now you get to share with us. So what is your name and one of your favorite things?"

Duo groaned. "Well my name is Duo and my favorite thing to do is to blow up things with a giant scythe!"

"… Well thanks for…sharing" Ryan as well as all the other cabin mates look stunned right out of their happy camp shorts. "Do we have any questions for Duo?"

One boy was brave enough to raise his hand "I got one"

"Okay Jamie, ask away" Ryan encouraged him

"Ah yeah, okay, what's with the bat? Don't you think it is kinda odd to have a stuffed animal as a guy at our age? And really, A BAT?"

Duo then decided to have some fun with this and tell the complete truth for the all the asked questions. _Just see how long they can survive around me then. HAHAHA. These little Christians will be crying home to their mommies before supper._ "Wellllll…. This is Foo Foo. My old best friend Solo made him for me when we where eight as a congratulations to me for stealing a stash of food from the government base for our gang." GRIN It always reminds me of him and those good times. Too bad he had to die from that gun shot through the chest. No doctors to save him, he just kept bleeding and bleeding. And there was me, holding him, covered with his warm blood, it pouring out all over. Oh yes life was rough on the streets but what could you do…Must say though, you really learn how to shoot a gun fast there."

Everyone stared. This just mad Duo smile even more. "Any more questions? I'm willing to answer anything here."

"The Spice Gir...mmnphs" A hand reached over to cover the mouth of the boy speaking.

Nobody dared to ask more questions

Ryan broke the ice. "Okay…. next person, in the bunk underneath Duo?"

"I'm Alex and I like marshal arts. I'm a black belt and I think what Duo said sounds kind cool. 'Cept for the part about his friend dieing." He looked up at Duo "That kinda sucks."

With everyone still afraid to talk, things went silent for a moment until…

DING DONG DING DONG

"Oh the supper bell! Is it that time already? I'll show you guys to the dining hall. Follow me!" Ryan stood up and headed towards the door.

Just as Duo was about to jump of the porch and onto the path, Alex came up beside him. "Want to sit beside each other? I kinda don't want to be stuck with one of these guys on each side of me. They're all kinda pussies if you ask me. Got a feeling you think that to."

Duo smiled a bit. "Sure." _At least I got someone who with me who may be kinda cool._

A/N: Well that is that. This part was longer than I though it would be. Guess I get to write 2 more chapters to be where I had wanted to be by the end of this chapter. Hope you enjoyed. I always love suggestions. Have a Happy Day!


	7. Pass the Getty

A/N: Hello and welcome back to the wonderful (not really) world of Camp Commune. Sorry this took so long but I was just about done and then my computer crashed and I lost everything. Today we have a special guest co-author, Bite Sized! (only for the title and first 3 chappies cause she had to go home) GLOMPS

Chapter 7: Pass the Getty

_Duo's Diary: Food…the worlds most useful Multitool_

Alex and Duo casually walked behind the others in their group, always remembering to keep a good distance from them. They discovered about each other and quickly became friends. Just as Duo was about to mention his other friends who were also at the camp, Ryan led them around a finally corner and pointed out the mess hall.

"Here it is boys. Now tonight, the last night of camp, and every Sunday evening, we will be eating as a group. Every other meal you are free to eat with whomever you choose. It's just this way we can all get closer and become our own wonderful little family! Won't that just be super dooper?" Man did this guy get cornier and cornier each moment he took a breath? "Now if you'll all just follow me. I can show you to our table." He led them inside the giant oak building and guided them towards a table centered in the middle of the room. Duo snagged an end seat while Alex to the only seat next to him. Everyone else gathered around the table to sit down.

During this null in Ryan's endless chatter, Duo had a few minutes to spare till supper while everyone else arrived into the hall, so he took this time to look around, mark quick escape routes, and find the others. He thought this to be a much better idea than conversing with his cabin mates. To his right and pass a few tables, there was a buffet table being filled with trays of spaghetti noodles, a variety of cheeses, and some bowls of sauce. Juice was lined up against the wall and next to the buffet was a smaller table that would house desserts once the majority of the camp had finished their meal.

To his horror, Duo saw that the log walls were plastered with crafts that previous campers ha made. A large cross was nailed on an overhang that was above a small stage-like area at the front of the room. It was through the large double doors here that Duo had entered the building. The only other visible escape route was through the emergency exit at the back of the hall.

With all that looked after, Duo then began to look for his friends. There at the table closest to the exit was Holly, yakking way in some deep conversation with Alise. Feeling his gaze on her, Holly looked in his direction and waved. He could see that even though this was bible camp, she was still having fun. While Duo pondered how that was possible he continued his search for the others. He was only able to find Quatre and Trowa when Pastor Jason stood up on the stage.

"Welcome everyone," he called out once he had everyone's attention, "to what will be the first of many wonderful suppers here at Camp Commune. We shall start off tonight by introducing you to the rest of the camp staff. Every meal you may have one of the councilors or staff members joins you at your table. Hopefully by the end of camp you will have gotten to know everyone." The G-boys all spontaneously gave a look of disgust as Jason continued to introduce the cooks, waterfront people and those in charge of certain activities.

Once the staff was know by all the pastor finished off his speech with a few deadly words. "Now let's bow our heads and say grace to the good guy upstairs!"

Unsure of what he should do, Duo looked around. Almost everyone had their heads down. The only ones who didn't were the Gundam pilots and the five girls from the bus. Alise didn't have any problems with prayer to her god. Holly was gesturing that they all follow the others and pretend to pray. Most of them followed her instructions but Duo listened a moment to what Jason was saying in his grace. He was thanking the lord for the great blessing of being able to have this camp and everyone here and blah blah blah….. Disagreeing with everything the youth pastor had to say, Duo shook his head at Holly and refused to participate. He kept his head straight up and twiddled his thumbs while looking to the front, right in into were the pastors eyes would look when he was finished talking. Holly smacked her head at his stupidity and stubbornness and put her head down.

Once all that was finished the tables were called up separately to come and get their food. Duo being the pig that he is was starving and was forced to nibble on the corner of his napkin as their table was the last to be announced. He quickly ran up and filled his plate to the overflowing brim and ran back down to the table, starting to eat while running before he was even halfway there.

Finishing that quite quickly, he then attacked the dessert table as soon as the scrumptious morsels were placed there. Luckily they did not have a guest at their table tonight or he would have been bitten in an attempt to get a response to anything he would have asked him. Duo's cabin mates were too afraid of him already to even try and talk with him during the meal and Alex just looked on with amusement.

"Man," he laughed, "do you always eat this way or just here? I must admit, it's a good way to keep everyone away from yah."

"Always" was Duo's reply as he took the last bite and started to lick some of the chocolate left on his plate. He put the clean plate down and grinned.

"Ah Duo, I think you have chocolate on your nose."

Duo stuck out his tongue and toughed the tip to his nose, licking off the delicious substance.

Alex looked in wonder at how easily the boy had done that. Duo just smiled. "I have a lot of practice with that one."

A few minutes went by with nobody saying anything. Most normal people were just about done their spaghetti when Duo's eyes lit up with an idea.

"How come I don't like that kind of look on _your_ face?" Alex leaned back a bit.

"Well you should. Now listen. When I tell you too, duck under the table. We're going to get outta here the old fashion way."

Alex gave him a questioning look but nodded. His life needed some excitement.

Duo reached over and grabbed Alex's almost finished plate. He then took the last handful of tomatoey pasta and took careful aim. Then…."NOW" Alex ducked under the table just in time to see the stings go sailing through the air.

_SPLAT_

Heero felt something wet hit him squarely in the back of his head. Feeling it, he felt the slimy noodles and looked back in the direction they must have come for. He saw Duo wink at him and then start to take cover under the table.

"Oh I am so going to get you!" Heero threw his cake but instead of hitting its target, he missed and hit Holly square on the chest. Surprised she looked up and immediately understood what was going on. She looked under the table, saw Duo wink. She then nudged Alise and whispered into her ear. A grin crossed the short girls face as she nodded and both girls grabbed some food and randomly tossed it into the air, sending it flying across the room to hit people.

Now that everyone knew what was happening, the food fight got under full swing. All the kids were involved, whether they wanted to be or not. Food was flying and even the little kids were having a blast. The small girl from the bus even threw her milk into Pastor Jason's face.

With everything into play, Duo then signaled for Alex to follow him. They crawled between aisle and under tables toward the emergency exit. There they met up with the others and started to sneak out through the door. Duo was the last one to go out. Right before he left, he took one final look at his masterpiece. All the councilors were trying to control the kids with very little luck. Duo ducked just as a piece of cake came flying in his direction. He picked it up' made sure the icing was facing out and strongly threw it into Ryan's face.

'_There_,' thought Duo, '_this is for being so happy and cheerful and annoying! You can have your cake and eat it too_.'

A/N Hope you like it and once again sorry for the long wait. Blame my stupid computer, even though this chapter is better the second time. Toodles and Now, I'm going to bed, since I refused to let myself sleep until I got this up for you guys. Man it is late.


	8. Stories and Torture

Chapter 8: Stories and Torture

_Duo's Diary: Girls can be evil and inhumane. Councilors can be _way_ worse._

Duo tumbled out of the bush into a small clearing, laughing as he fell into a heap beside the others. Everyone was out of breath from the long run that had brought them here.

"Oh man! That was awesome!" Duo exclaimed. He then turned to Holly. "You are my hero."

"Thank you, thank you very much. Now, you have noodles stuck all over your back."

Duo spun his head around and caught sight of the cherry red sauce. "Eek! I've been hit. I feel faint. Things are starting to get dark. I see a light. Must go towards the light. Goodbye cruel world." And with that, he collapsed to the ground.

Bridget laughed, and going along with the joke, bounded over and began shaking Duo by the shoulders. "No Duo!. Stay away from the light."

Alex pushed her aside. "That won't help. We'll have to do mouth to mouth. Ewww, wait, what am I saying? How about CPR? Push and push and push and…" Duo smiled from within his 'death'.

"Stop with the pushing. I have a much more effective, and fun, way. Stand back!" Holly stood by Duo's feet and began to wind up for a kick. "All we have to do is hit him where it hurts. That could bring anyone back from the dead."

"Or put him there." Heero commented under his breath as he casually put his hand in front of his fly.

Holly started to slowly move her foot forward, inch by inch. She got rather close before Duo sat up. "Oh you are so mean!"

"I know." She grinned evilly.

"Oh you are going to die for that!" And with that said, he tackled Holly and began tickling her mercilessly.

Once Holly had finally escaped, everyone lied down to gaze up at the clouds. "So," Heero perked up, "where are we anyways?"

Holly sat up. "This is my special place that I found my first week here, 2 years ago. I always come to get away from all the poofs here. If you take the path over there, it will lead you to a part of the river that's pretty deep and the current is slow so it makes for some great late night swimming. And it's awesome cause you can't hear any of the camp noises here but you're still on camp grounds. Only 3 people know of this area, including me, and 2 of them aren't here this year."

"Friends from before?" Trowa asked.

"Yeah. I met them the first night I was ever here. None of us wanted to come so we got together and made some of our own fun. But they both got summer jobs. Thought I'd be here all alone until I met these girls here a few months ago. And then we met you guys."

"So do I dare even ask how you found this spot?"

"Well you see… In our 'Make Camp Fun' plan, we decided to cover some of the guys with a ton of whipped cream we found when we had snuck into the kitchen. Just as we were done and heading out the door, they woke up and found out what we did. So they chased us into the woods. After a bit of running we lost them by jumping into the river and hiding underwater. And then we found the path to here."

They stayed there chatting and swapping stories for quite a while until Quatre sprang up. "Umm guys. The sun is setting. What time is it?"

Bridget looked at her watch. "Oh my god! It's almost 10. We are going to be in so much shit!"

Now, would this be because we're out so late and no one knows where we are, or because we started a food fight and Duo threw cake in his councilors face, or because we ditched supper?" Wufie asked.

Alise spoke up. "I'd have to say option four, all of the above. We've been gone fore hours. Let's head back. Anyone have any idea how not to get the punishment of a lifetime?"

"Run hard and fast and hope for the best?" It was the only thing that Alex could think of. The others agreed and off they went. It didn't take them long to get back to the main grounds. Once they did, they all decided to head straight for their cabins and meet outside the chapel first thing tomorrow so they could sit together for the morning service. Maybe their councilors would think they had just decided to take a nap after supper and they were there the whole time. Maybe.

Duo and Alex tiptoed back to the cabin. They then crept around the side and looked up. Crap! The lights were on. Ryan was no where to be seen but all the residential pussies where there. Some read books while others sat on there beds looking worried. They two boys shrunk back down and sat under the window.

Alex sighed. "Well that changes our plans."

"Maybe….or… wait… yeah it does. But I think I have another idea. Just follow my lead."

Together they walked in through the front door, looked about and sighed. "Finally we found it!" Duo exaggerated every word.

Now when these two had come in, everyone glanced up to see who it was. Seeing the boys, they crowded around. " What happened?", "Where were you?", the questions came continuous until abruptly stopped by one comment by Jamie, the same brave kid who asked about Duo's stuffed bat earlier.

"You guys are going to be so dead when Ryan gets back."

Duo looked at him. "Well that's not very nice, and after all we've been through too."

"What'd you go through?" asked one of the younger boys. Duo thought he remembered someone calling him Todd at one point.

"Well you see, here we were having a nice relaxing supper when all of a sudden all that milk I drank hit bottom. I must say, I really had to go." He then looked at Alex, hoping that he would add to the story. It would seem more realistic if both of them seemed to know what had happened.

Alex easily took the hint. "Yes, and remembering the camp's Buddy System rule, he asked me to accompany him. Then we rushed out as quickly as possible so poor little Duo here wouldn't have an accident."

"Alas I fear that we must have taken the wrong path for what after seemed like an eternity, we were not yet at our final destination, but instead were caught in the middle of a treacherous forest. We wandered for what seemed like forever."

"Good thing we found that cliff for Duo to take a wiz over or he might have been here with wet pants." Duo gave Alex a quick glare before resuming his rendition of the story.

"Yes…anyways, finally after much wandering we reached a path. Following it, we soon popped out at the edge of camp. It was a horrible ordeal and the whole time we were scared witless. "

Jamie laughed. "Yeah right. They've already discovered a whole group of you guys missing. There is no way that all you guys happened to disappear at the same time. Right now Ryan is with the other councilors and Pastor Jason discussing what might have happened and where you guys might be. That and the food fight." He gave Duo with a smirk, proving that he knew exactly who the first food flingers were.

"Aw Shit!" Duo mentally punched himself. He really should have done a better surveillance when he first got to this place. Then he would have known who to look out for. Oh well, he thought; guess that just means that I can get my revenge in the sweetest way possible. Now what shall I do…I think I'll get everyone involved in this. Could make for some good friendship bonding and that's one of the reasons I was sent here, right?

At that moment, Ryan walked through the doorway, shedding his coat on one of the many hooks provided. He took one look at Duo and Alex and then sighed with relief. For one brief second he looked happy. And then he snapped back to reality. "Duo! Alex! Where on earth were you two? Do you know how worried we were? Either way, you two are coming with me right away. Pastor Jason will want to hear you explanation."

They followed him out the door, heads slightly down. They were not ashamed of what they did, oh no; they just didn't want to get punished. It could end up as a real drag.

For what seemed like much silence, Ryan led them down a twist of paths and towards the main camp office. Once there, Duo looked up and saw a swarm of people. Many were other adults but there in the middle was his favorite group. Quatre was almost in tears and Trowa was comforting him. Wufie was being antisocial and Heero just looked bored. The majority of the girls on the other hand looked quite proud of themselves. Holly had a huge smile spread across her face. Duo burst away from Ryan, with Alex trailing after. He then proceeded to pounce right beside the girl.

"So you got caught too?" She waited for Duo to nod before she continued. "Yeah, me too. I thought it was safe to go in cause all the lights were off but everyone was just tricking me. They all ended up jumping out and tackling me once I came in. I think they're a little too used to me doing this. Even my councilor just laughed, and commented on how much shit I'll be in this time. She can be pretty cool."

Just then Alex turned to them. "Hey guys, the adults were just talking and I think they got enough of the story together to figure out what happened. They're coming this way."

Jason stood before they teens. "Well everyone. I think you know how awful what you guys did was. A food fight, running off, staying out late, and Duo, you not praying! But it's God's place to put the final judgment on what you do. Think about what you did. And to help you get more into the wholesome Christian spirit and back on God's track, we have a treat for you..."

At this moment Holly's councilor, Tommie, looked over at her and nodded an almost evil smirk in her eyes.

Jason continued "On recommendation by Tommie here, you will all be watching 3 hours of 'Veggie Tales' movies tomorrow evening. Won't that be fun?"

"NOOOOOOO!"

AN: We'll that's the end of a long chapter. Sorry it gets a little slow at the end but what can you do. And for those who don't know, Veggie Tales is a series of movies based on the bible and Christian philosophy and such, all done by singing, talking vegetables.


	9. A Bad Start

AN: Sorry, for the uber long wait. Gomen Gomen! I blame evil writer's block and final exams. But don't worry, here it is.

Chapter 9: A Bad Start

_Duo's Diary: Sometimes it is dangerous to ones essence to sleep in._

The next 12 hours were filled with treacherous nightmares for our little Duo. He was now being under careful observation and that meant no sneaking out at night, at least for now. While this was bad, it did give him some time to think. Tomorrow was going to be the start of their camp activities and he needed some survival ideas. But the hard thing was they didn't get the schedule till the morning after chapel. So what to plan? He ended up falling asleep within the first five minutes of Lights Out, his brain too lazy to even to go into thought and his arms tightly wound around Foo-foo.

The morning came too suddenly for Duo. The sun shone brightly across his face and seemed to angle perfectly into his eyes. "Mmmmurugh", Duo groaned," Why the bloody hell does the sun have to be so bright?" He rolled over and pulled his sleeping bag higher over his head, creating a cocoon effect.

"Good Morning!" That voice, that horrible, horrible voice. And so early. He peeked an eye out of the corner of his haven and caught a glance of Ryan standing right next to his head, a big smile on his face.

"WhaaAhHHH…" Duo was caught by surprised and started flailing in order to get away from his oppressor, but alas our hero was unaware of the difficulties that a sleeping bag presents in these kinds of situations. Realizing the tight confinement, he only started to thrash harder. Remember, he is on the top bunk and being Duo, he had refused to put up the wooded plank between the mattress and the bed frame that was to act as a barrier. Smart smart Duchan. And now we grab the popcorn and watch as he ever so gracefully falls over the edge and lands flat on his face onto the centre of the cold floor.

Now Duo was mad. Not only was he laying face first on a very cold floor but everyone was laughing at him.

"Well that's one way top get out of bed." Ryan commented with a grin upon his face. He turned around and addressed everyone. "Now you guys have 15 min to get dressed and washed up. Then meet outside the cabin. And no dawdling." This last comment was directed at Duo, who had curled up once again, this time in the middle of the floor. "If you're late, that just means less time for you to eat breakfast before Chapel!"

"Well at least we get to eat with our friends today." Duo slowly picked himself up and headed towards his shelving space. Once there he grabbed a pair of black board shorts and a white t-shirt. It was suppose to be incredibly hot this summer and the white really accented the tan he had received from already spending every waking minute outside away from his family. He then proceeded to braid his long hair, which he had undone for the night.

Quickly rushing over to the bathroom, he brushed his teeth and washed his face, taking extra care to make sure every speck of oil and grease was vanquished. Freakishly, he spoke to said specks while destroying them.

"Die Oil Die! Quick Coronal Facecloth, before the zit troops arrive. ATTACK!"

"Well Duo, do you always talk to your face that way or are you just practicing a skit for later?" Holly was leaning on the door to one of the stalls. She walked over to the sink beside Duo and turned on the tap.

"What the hell are you doing here!" He reached down to cover his crotch area, even though he was fully dressed. "This is the guy's bathroom!"

"Yeah, I know. But the girls one is absolutely packed .And with your head being the only one in here, this one is completely empty. Besides, all the toilets have stalls. It's not like I could ever see anything."

Duo was still stunned from his encounter first glimpse of her. Holly just giggled and led the boy outside. She then turned and ran off, only to call back to him, "Hurry or you'll be late! And you don't want to know what happens with late comers." He could hear the smugness in her voice.

Duo rushed back to his cabin to find the others already gone. Crap, how could he have missed them. There was only one thing left to do. Run.

Panting, our hero reached the mess hall just as pastor Jason was standing up on the stage. He tried to silently slip in and find the others but was discovered instantly. By Holly.

"Oh No," She was so dramatic, "Looks like Duo is late! How rude of him to interrupt Pastor Jason just as he was about to start grace!"

Jason looked at him. "Well, looks like this is the prime opportunity to show late comers what happens if you're a few minutes late. Come on up here." Duo went over to him. "Congrats! You get to say grace."

"WHAT!"

"Go on, no one can eat until you do." As if to enforce this fact, Duo stomach growled. He looked over to the grinning Holly. At some point, he would have to get his revenge.

"Umm…okay, what on earth to say…" Duo had to think fast. He normally just blocked out his family the moment anything religious was brought up. However, he had seen one grace on a TV episode. "Rub a Dub dub, thanks for the grub."

Everyone stared at him for what seemed like an eternity. So, after what was really only a few seconds, he added "Amen" to the end and abruptly left the stage. Everyone was stunned for a second and then they quickly bowed their heads and repeated the last word.

Duo walked over to the two adjacent that housed a mix of the remaining G-boys and the girls. He sat on the end of one of the benches and turned away from the group to pout. Moments later Jason regained his composure and announced "Time to Eat!". As the group began to turn to get up and go to the buffet table, they saw that Duo was somehow already there, with a plate full of food and a big grin once again plastered on his face.

AN. Sorry for a semi-short chapter. This one and the soon to be next one were suppose to be one but it works out better to have them as two. Plus then you would have to wait another month for it as I leave for holidays tomorrow. Hope you enjoyed it! TOODLES!

PS: thanks to the readers who reminded me how long it's been since an update. I wrote this chapter now because of you Sqush.


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